Season of the Witch

Does the idea of Ron Perlman headbutting Satan appeal to you in any way? If the answer’s no, stop reading now. If it’s yes, you’re in for the first guilty treat of 2011.

Perlman and Nicolas Cage (in curly blond pageboy frightwig, natch) play rambunctious Crusader knights who go Awol and find themselves in a non-specific, plague-stricken East European principality. The Catholic authorities claim that said epidemic is the work of a captive witch (Claire Foy), and waste no time hiring Nic and Ron to chaperone the prisoner through mountain country to have her soul cleansed at a monastery.

No one, least of all Cage or director Dominic Sena, makes any bid for greatness: despite its admirably straight face, ‘Season of the Witch’ is a silly romp through Pythonesque medieval cliché and knockabout Hammer horror with a dash of cut-price Tolkien chucked in to keep things moving. Cage barks, emotes and swears inappropriately, ably backed by Perlman as his burly sidekick, and the cast is padded out with the likes of Christopher Lee as a devious, hideously scarred cardinal.‘Season of the Witch’ is not for everyone: it’s creaky, predictable and frequently idiotic. But for a tipsy Saturday night, this should tick all the right boxes.